Sitting on a Beach in Maui, Obsessed with My Twitter Profile

We've been in Hawaii for almost 3 weeks now. Day 3 I was sitting on the Maui beach at sunset and all I could think about was Twitter! My mind was driving me absolutely bonkers! I came home that night and wrote this blog post — which I didn't publish right away because I felt too vulnerable at the time. I'm a little more removed now and ready to share....

[This post is accompanied by extra photos from Sophie's photo shoot because Sophie is one of my best friends and when I'm stressed about stupid stuff I talk to her and somehow everything gets better. I'm sure she could help me work through this ridiculous social media stress if she were here with me in Maui. lol]




"I sat on the beach tonight watching Miggy swimming (I mean crashing) in the waves. The sun was setting behind the rocks and the warmest glorious breeze brushed past my skin. I was trying to meditate but every couple minutes I had to open my eyes to check on Migs and make sure he hadn't been washed away to sea. I'm embarrassed to admit that despite being smack dab in the middle of this piece of paradise my brain was on hyper-speed.

All I could think about was my Twitter profile. How can I describe myself in 3 words? Should I change the background color on my blog? Should I redesign the header at the top of my blog? What should my Facebook profile say about me? God this is terrible. I feel so consumed by this need to define myself & pinpoint my brand so it represents me perfectly.

Despite the fact I'm on a tropical sabbatical, I'm still feeling that tightness in my chest when I think of what I want my Twitter profile to say — ridiculous, right? I mean, I could spend all day and night — literally — stressing and rearranging my online profiles. I promise though, I've been resisting, sitting on my hands, holding out, not giving in to this crazy temptation.

Such trivial things but somehow they seem to affect me so strongly. Why!!! It's so annoying. I wish I didn't care about it. I kind of dream of a "crazy" world where I don't have a Facebook account. It seems so peaceful in that alternative universe. I want to give into that world but I'm also afraid to leave the land of branding or loose my social media following that I've worked so hard to collect. I like knowing that people around the world are reading what I write on my blog. It feeds my ego, making me feel important, significance, noticed. It's scary to unplug and admit that I'm just another human in this big big world — one of 8 billion — and I'm unknown. I could easily disappear and 99.9999% of the world would carry on without blinking. Oh, why can't I just sit on the tropical beach free of all these worries? My photography brand and business has taken over my life — a parasite that I adore too much to get rid of.

I supposed that why I'm here in Hawaii - to figure out who/how I want to be, discovering my identity as a person, an artist and a writer. How I'm going to balance it all with everyday life and keep perspective on what's really important. Not an easy task but I'm crossing my fingers hoping that the Hawaiian air is going to help me out ;)"



Am I alone is this boat or is there someone else out there that can relate to my total craziness?
Do you ever stay up late thinking about your Twitter Profile? 
Do you simultaneously love and hate Facebook?
Do you daydream about what your company colors should be when you're supposed to be sleeping, listening attentively or having sex?
Do you crave praise, acknowledgement & affirmation from the world-wide-web (but feel like you should stop worrying about that and invest more time in your friends & family (people you actually know personally who make your life worthwhile)?
Please tell me I'm not alone on this one my friends. 

Hydrangea Beauty Portraits — The Beginning of a BOOK?

Inspired by the tropical breezes coming in through my window, I want to share some exotic portraits that I took of my dear friend Shivana. Shivana is 15 but she has the presence of a woman with many more years of wisdom beneath her super glam-fashion belt. I love how Shivana always has her nails painted with a bright color or a fun intricate pattern. She inspires me to be more disciplined with my nail-health. (I can be so lazy with manicures — don't you just hate it when all of your nails are different lengths and the paint is chipping? Ah!!)

Last summer, our two families had a dinner party together which magically morphed into a nighttime photo shoot that incorporated my mom's gorgeous blue/purple hydrangeas. It got too dark to shoot with natural light so we brought out the big yellow construction light and shone it through my round transparent reflector to soften the light (so it wasn't so harsh on Shivana's face). These are the images we created last summer:

So naturally, this summer when Shivana came to my studio with her mom & grandma (for a 3 generations photo shoot) I ran outside with my scissors to grab a bushel of blue hydrangeas! Hanna (my make up artist) and I went crazy. We were so excited to decorate Shivana with these flowers and although I do say so myself, I think we created a masterpiece of floral clothing. Pretty much worthy of winning "Project Runway", don't cha think? ;) 

This time we had tons of natural daylight to work with and I didn't hold back with my obsession with backlighting portraits. I don't think anything makes a photograph so romantic, glowy and gorgeous as using backlight! I just love it! Shivana and I have started talking about getting together every August to do a hydrangea shoot. We could make it a whole series and maybe one day publish it into a pretty coffee table book! Plus, it's so awesome to see how my photography skills and style have changed over the past year. Have a yearly project could be a great way to monitor my growth as an artist. 

So... without further ado... I present to you this year's hydrangea portraits:

What do you think?

Have you ever done a yearly project?

BIG THANK YOU to my darling Hanna Mazur for creating beautiful hair & make up for this year's shoot!

{My Happiness Project) Go Nuts!

We pulled into the Costco parking lot, looked at each other with an impish grin and decided to buy something tasty - a special treat. Typically, we always walk straight back to the fresh vegetables and fish section, averting our eyes away from all the sweet yummy stuff in pretty florescent packages that they throw in your face right up at the front. We are pretty darn healthy so our idea of a special treat is in a way different league than Oreos and Doritos. We're talkin' honey roasted peanuts, yogurt covered raisins, chocolate covered protein bars! Oh, I'm in heaven just thinking about all that. 

For lots of people these 'treats' are their idea of 'healthy.' Nuts, dried fruit, protein bars. Well, let me tell ya, when you're spending your afternoons chowing down on chilled celery, a little honey goes a LONG way. So now you can see our devilish excitement at the idea of actually pausing at the front of the shop to purchase something from the 'tasty-aisle.'

We had a spontaneous plan, let's buy a special treat and then cuddle up in bed and watch a movie together. We LOVE this idea. We know exactly which treat we're going for - coconut covered cashews. We throw them in the basket and proceed to our normal shopping route. But somewhere in the peanut butter aisle Miggy decides to ditch the cashews. He pauses, lifts the container from the basket, stares at it, makes that face, and slips them onto the shelf. 

I ask him, why? He says it's better for us to spend our money on vegetables and fish. That way the money is actually benefiting our health. The cashews are unnecessary, especially when we're on such a tight budget. 

I completely understand where he's coming from. In fact, I totally agree. We continue shopping. But there was a niggle in the back of my mind. I couldn't help feeling like we'd just stolen something precious from ourselves. At this point I didn't care about the cashew nuts. My concern was more the principle of following through with a treat, an idea, a romantic date. I think it's more harmful to plan the date and back out than it is to not plan a date at all. I think Miggy's been trying to explain this to me for years but it took some nuts at Costco for me to finally understand. 

If we'd been tempted to buy the cashews on a whim, I think it's better for us to resist them. We'll forget about them once we're back in the car. But it wasn't a whim. We had created a plan for a romantic evening, a special time for us to spend together to enjoy each other's company. When Miggy slid the nuts back onto the shelf it felt like he was giving up on our date. It wasn't that this hurt my feelings but rather that it made me realize how beautiful it is to celebrate little things in life and how harmful it can be to live in a constant state of self-deprivation. 

99% of the time we want to stick to our budget and eat healthily but in order to live a balanced happy and healthy life we also have to incorporate pleasure and a bit of indulgence. If you take something away you need to add something else to replace it. If you're only ever taking away you'll be left empty. Just to clarify, I'm not talking about treating yourself to fattening nuts and movies every day of your life. It's more of a once a month date-night kind of thing. You need to include that indulgence AND the resistance to keep that balance.   

We went back and retrieved our cashews and for once it felt really good to drive home knowing that we'd decided to treat ourselves and we followed through. We bought the nuts and now we can watch a movie and nibble together on nuts, a simple most delicious pleasure. 

Resolution 5: Every now and then, Go Nuts

Resolution 6: When you make plans to treat yourself, follow through.

Check out the previous "My Happiness Project" posts from September:

Celebration Success Depends on Planning

Treat Everyday Like a Celebration

Celebrating the Rain

Intro

During October, I'm going to be exploring 'Belonging'. My main motivation for this theme is that I come from a diverse background and I've moved around a few times and I feel like I can fit into a bunch of different cultures but sometimes, I'm envious of people who are deeply rooted in one culture, one group of people, one location. I feel a longing for a deeper sense of belonging. But I'm convinced that with a little bit of introspection I'll be able to figure out where I fit it and embrace it. 

Sales Tips Series Part 2: Salesmanship Begins at NO

Welcome back for part 2 of this uber exciting Sales Tips series! Check out previous tips:

Part 1: Start Selling at HELLO 

This is the part we'll all afraid of. We all dread that moment when the client says "No, I can't afford that." or "No, I don't want that." In the past I've always skirted the issue. If they can't afford product #1, I'll show them product #2 which is less expensive and hope they take the bait. But that's not selling like a clever businesswoman. That's avoiding selling because I'm afraid to pop my comfort bubble. I need to start practicing turning no's into yes's.

• It's ALL about getting the client to say 'yes'. If they're saying 'yes' (about anything), you're getting closer to a sale.
• When you reach an obstacle in the sales session (it costs too much, they don't like the image, they can't decide etc....) and they say 'no', that's your cue to start asking question, digging deeper and leading towards a 'yes.' 
• It's not about tricking them into buying something they don't really want. That's sleazy. You're helping them figure out what they want so you can be the one to give it to them.
• Don't assume you know why they're saying 'no" — you are not a mind reader. Ask why and you might be able to solve their problem, offer an alternative solution etc...
• If they say they don't have any money right now, don't assume they'll never have money in the future. This is when you could say, "I will be keeping all of your images in my archive, which means you can always purchase them in the future when the time is right. Would you be interested in that?" ..... "Yes." (SUCCESS!)
• You don't have to turn 'no, I don't want an album' into 'yes, i want an album." Instead, by asking questions what you'll do is turn, "no, I don't want a 12x12 album." into "yes, I want a 8x8 album." They just have to say 'yes' to something and you'll end up with a sale.

Have you ever been afraid of tough questions from clients?

Stay tuned for Sales Tips Part 3! We're going to be talking about how you can direct conversations with clients towards closes & sales!